:( NOT how I planned the evening!

This morning I got the line on my OPK (Ovulation Predictor Kit) you would of thought it was a BFP the way I hopped around excitedly! I guess I was just glad that everything seemed in working order and that precious egg was on its way…..so the only thought that occupied my brain today was BD! (Baby dancing) I spent the afternoon cleaning the house, tidying the bedroom, placing scented candles about the house and shopping for OH fav meal and buying a little saucy underwear 😉

I imagined the evening……
He comes home from work, has a refreshing shower, we enjoy a glass of wine with a yummy dinner….maybe sit down to watch a little tv… But of course we won’t be able to keep our hands off each other and we would go straight up to bed and make made passionate love………and conceive haha

How the evening went…….
I was late getting home, he didn’t go and shower because he couldn’t be bothered, we ate dinner, sat down to watch tv and he fell into the deepest sleep imaginable……..

I am now sat upstairs whilst he is downstairs fast asleep on the sofa.

My efforts have failed and I feel rejected by my own aspirations.

Bedroom is now dark and a lonely place after candles being blown out, my new lingerie is hanging on the chair unused and I just want to curl in a ball and sob.
I know I maybe am over reacting and there is still tomorrow but after I have gone through so much anticipation today, have I just set myself up for a massive fall. Do men have it easy?

I’m feeling very angry, I have changed my diet completely, I exercise everyday without fail, I drink grapefruit juice, Green Tea and all the necessary vitamins needed, I temp every morning, I take OPKs to work to pee on at lunch time, I track my cycles and constantly check symptoms, cm and cp.
We get a tiny gap per month to try our best to conceive the family we both dream of…so why does it feel I’m doing all the work. I don’t do all the preparations each month for OH to come home and be too tired to make the effort.
I guess I will have to hope that tomorrow goes a little better………..the fun sometimes just disappears and I hate the fact that something that should be so natural feels so mechanical and forced 😦

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6 thoughts on “:( NOT how I planned the evening!

  1. TTC sex is the worst ever! We have had our fair share of it now, it’s one of the reasons I stopped using OPK’s too much pressure, I get the EW mucus and OV pain so I just go by that, but after 20 months of trying, sex is just, well, hard work! Lol! I hope things go more to your plan tonight, we used to not wait till the evenings either TTC with LC, I would jump OH as soon as he got home or we would have a quicky in the morning, we were more likely to get some in then, unfortunately after a couple of months all the romance goes out of it and you just get on and do it lol! Good luck honey x x x

    • Thank you my lovely, know exactly where you coming from, its a shame it becomes so mechanical we finally managed to do some BDing early evening and morning, might have a rest tonight and go for it again tomorrow 🙂 such a chore lol xxx

  2. Oh man, I can relate. When we first started down this road I was excited to have “mandated sex”.

    Our second month after my DH had his vasectomy reversal surgery I had minor surgery to get two wisdom teeth removed… on ovulation day. A friend dropped me off at home. It was about 6:30 and I hadn’t eaten, but I had taken the percocet they gave me. As I tried to open the front door I swayed and thankfully DH came to my rescue. He stood there looking white as a sheet and then turned around and flopped on the couch while I stumbled inside.

    “I have a fever,” he said wanly. “102! I’m dying.”

    “Too bad. Take off your pants, I’m ovulating.”

    We proceeded to have the worst sex in recorded history, ever. My face was throbbing, he kept nodding off and I had to blow on his face to wake him up.

    Hot, right? 🙂

    Mandated sex lost it’s appeal soon after and funny enough, he was the one who needed coaxing on ovulation days more than I did. I never would have thought a man would needed to prodded to perform on command but apparently he’s more romantic than me!

    • The things we put ourselves through! its so sad that the fun dissapears and you end up pinning all your hopes on what ‘might’ happen. I must admit I didnt tell OH that I was ovulating this weekend, I just told him I was feeling in the mood and dragged him upstairs…..I think he feels the pressure sometimes aswell and he performs much better when he isnt stressing lol xx

  3. Sounds like you planned a lovely romantic evening. It’s heartbreaking when you go to so much effort and the other person doesnt even realise. This has happened to me a few times so now if Im planning something I text my OH during the day to tell to get home on time as there’s a surprise in store.

    It means that he knows somethings going in but the excitement of not knowing what it is means he comes home in a really good mood. There was one time where he text me back and said he was going out with his work mates! (how annoyed?!)

    • I was so annoyed but he has since been forgiven! Its just you wait a whole month for that tiny window to BD in! Why can’t we ovulate a few times a month 😉
      Yes that’s a good trick used that many times, he wouldn’t dare reply with going out with his mates haha xx

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